She asked me a simple question and I became speechless. Not because I didn't know what to say, because trust me, I knew what to say. No one had ever asked me that question before and I was not at all ready to say it out loud. I figured as long as it was in my mind, I would be safe. I love to store old memories there, like an old-but still reliable hard drive I plan to use again someday. Oddly enough, the moment I began to speak the words aloud, I could see each word, sentence and phrase disintegrate right in front of my face. "When did you know it was him? I mean like when did you know he was the one you wanted to be with?" At first I didn't know whether to say something or run and hide. I thought for a moment and took in all the air I could. Then I spoke the realest shish I ever spoke....(it went something like this) I knew when I looked into his eyes. It was weird actually. I was standing there at the bus stop, minding my own business, when he pulled up and started to talk to me. I was shocked at first, like maybe he thought I was someone else, but nope, he was talking to me. He asked me my name and if I needed a ride. First of all, who does that? Second, was he for real? I told him my name of course and he offered me a ride to school...nice one buddy, I am clearly not headed to any school within 10 miles of that bus stop - they were all High Schools! After I squashed that theory, he offered to take me wherever I was going. 'I only want to spend a little time with you' he said. Wow, who did this dude take me for. Women (in my opinion at the time) who get into cars with strangers were either prostitutes, desperate and starving for attention, or crazy as hell, and will end up on the local news on some ol' local "woman found dead in an alley" type shish. But there was something about his eyes. I wasn't afraid of him at all. I didn't feel threatened by him one bit. He didn't send my defences into over-drive. He seemed harmless to me. I didn't feel like I would end up on the news, so I got in and we were off. Needless to say, he didn't kill me, well at least not with a weapon anyway. When he dropped me off, I thought that would be the last time I would ever see him again, despite the fact that he asked for my number. I gave him my number and told him it was my birthday. He said he would call me for lunch and pick me up. In my mind I was like 'yeah right' but I gave him the benefit anyway. Not that I waited for him to call me on my lunch break or anything, but I gave the benefit. Low and behold, he didn't call...he came up to my job and picked me up! Imagine that. Something about not saving my number properly. He took me to Subway for my 'Happi Borndate' lunch and asked me out for a birthday dinner later that night. I was floored by all the attention I was getting from him. Not that I was in any way in any lack of attention (that part came easy), it was the chase that was the hard part. Girl, I was so excited for the rest of that day. I went home and put on my favorite sexy dress and got all 'dressed up.' I couldn't wait to see his face again, spend some time with him, and hear his voice. My Mother and some of the neighbors were standing outside on the lawn of my apt building talking when I came down stairs. I think they were secretly waiting to see what he looked like. He called me and said he was on the corner, and wanted to know if that was me in the orange colored dress. 'Yes that's me' I said with a girlish grin. He was on his way to my building, when a car that was coming down the street (with the right away of course) hit his car, or he hit them, or they hit each other - which ever the case, they both got out, had some words and he came on down to my building. I introduced him to my Mother and neighbors and we were off. I asked him later about the "accident" and he said because he had a gun in the car, they settled for 100 bucks. He later told me he felt it was my fault for looking so sexy in my orange dress...Ha! She wanted to know more and I couldn't stop talking. "What was he like then? Was he the same as he is now? Did he seem to have secrets?"At first he didn't. He was an open book to all of the questions I was asking at least. I asked his full name, where he lived, was he married, how old he was, was he in school, where he worked etc. Then he pointed out that I had failed to ask the most obvious question. "Which was? " His nationality. He didn't look black and he didn't look white, I thought he was Arab (lol) turned out he was/is Italian. (sexy!) His mother is Black and his Father is Italian. But you know all of this right? I mean after all you met his Mother...I never did. In the past 9yrs that I have known him, I can count on one hand how many friends I have met. I have never met his children for crying out loud! Not that I'm upset that you have, it's just...I thought he would at least introduce me to his children. He knows how much I love children. Anyway, I met his Father and youngest brother however. Anyway, back to the story, we went to see a movie that night for my birthday. I still remember the movie we saw. It was Original Sin with Angelina Jolie and Antonio Banderas. It was a really good movie. I remember when the sex scenes were going on, we would try not to look at one another. It was quite awkward. I kept thinking what a nice guy he was. How handsome he was and how I wanted him to kiss me like in the movies. You know, the guy looks at the girl lovingly and goes in for the kiss-sort of sneaking it without asking her permission. I thought his lips were sexy enough to steal a kiss for myself. Needless to say, he got way more than a kiss, and so did I. He kept telling me how innocent he thought I was and how that was very refreshing to see. He would always look at me with this strange look on his face. I thought maybe my breath wasn't fresh or something. I finally asked him after a long seductive kiss, 'why do you look at me like that?' He said it was because when I am kissing him, I didn't seem so innocent. Wow, I thought to myself. I thought after that lovely night I would never hear from him again, and I was okay with that. I had already fixed my mind on the possibility I would never see him again and I had started the preparation processes the moment he dropped me off at home the next day. This was his first, but not last time proving me WRONG-O! He called that same day. He came over every chance he could, he would ride me around with him to places he needed to go. I went to his apartment often, he came to mine. We played video games together...it was perfect. "Then?" Then he did something very suspect and I tried to ignore it. He came over with his game system once and got a phone call. Told me it was his friend. He told me he was leaving to pick up his cord for the game system, and he never came back. Almost like going to pick up some bread and never coming home... Anyway, he called me of course to say something came up, and he would be by to get his game system, but he seemed really strange once he did. Later I find out he didn't go home to get a cord, he went to CSU to see his GIRLFRIEND! Can you believe that sh**t! Well, after that I made every effort to make him see it was me he needed to be with, to no avail of course. Then she began to call me. Yes, she started calling and hanging up. Then she got brave and said some nasty sh**t to me several times-about him being her husband and what not. When I confronted him about it, he denied being her husband and told me he would deal with it. "Hotmess.com!" Yes it was. Then the worst thing ever happen..."What happened?" I found out I was El Preggo! Yep, that's right I was knocked up and he was the baby daddy. I felt it was only right to tell him about his pending fatherhood in hopes he would be as happy as I was at the time. Not knowing he would be the furtherest thing from happy, because he not only had two children already, he had one on the way with..."Psycho chick"? Yes, and he freaked! He called me mean and vindictive....can you belive that sh**t?!!! I was too out done....just thinking about it now makes me sad...
#TBC
