A Super-Woman's Diary

Wanna See A Picture of HIM? Do You Know HIM?

She shakes the sheets free of the crumbs that fell from her pop tart and straightens her blanket. After checking to see if there were any missed calls or text messages on her sidekick, she plugs the charger in and settles in for the night. Not being able to sleep knowing those pop tart crumbs were still on the floor, she leaps up, grabs the broom and dust pan sweeping them away and returning to bed. Laying in the dark living room she stares up at the ceiling and watches the different shapes form from the lights outside her window. The motion light on the building flashes from bright to dim and off again. She makes a rhythm in her mind that coincides with the timing of the lights. She can hear the TV speak from the other rooms: HGTV is on in one room and a commercial for Madagascar 2 in another. Drowning out those sounds she shifts her weight to one side and tries to close her eyes. There in that moment a thought of him infiltrates her mind and robs her of precious sleep. So she reaches...

I Absolutely Adore My New Hairstyle!

I honestly thought that I knew him better then I do. I mean we have know one another for quite some time. Since 2001 to be exact. Yet I don't know him...at all. Or maybe I met the "Representative" when I met him. I don't know why that thought just popped in my head, but I had to write it down. Interesting....Ummmgh.

I have come to the realization that the things that happen to me concerning men are all my fault. That's right the same way I take full responsibility for my actions when it comes to my relationship with Christ Jesus, I take with my relationships with men. They can and will only do what I allow. If I allow them to talk to me any kind of way, I can't then get upset when they talk to me any kind of way. If I allow them to treat me any kind of way, I can't then get upset when they treat me any kind of way. If I allow them to come and go whenever they please, I can't then get upset when they come and go as they please. This was all made clear to me about 30 min ago, when this guy that I can't seem to let go of (but am now seriously contemplating switching gears) called me and literally cursed me out. For no reason might I add. I simply called him to ask a question concerning my computer and he began to use some very unsavory language against me. Now in my mind I was l...

"You gave her 400.00 dollars to pay some credit card debt she had, but the car you co-signed for is behind 2 months Momma!!" I am so frustrated right now I want to scream. Nothing is going good for me right now. I am having Panic Attacks again and everything. I am under so much stress right it is not funny and I have no one to talk to but the Lord, and I haven't even been doing that lately. I feel so lost and confused and lonely and hurt and by myself. I can't take another thing I swear. I didn't even ask her to co-sign for my car. I would have just waited, but she said "no I want to help you." She has not helped me yet. That's what a co-signer is for...to help in your time of need. I mean that's what I thought. I was paying every car note and maintaining my car just fine until I lost my job. And even then I was paying the note with my unemplyment checks. I never asked her for help and the minute I do she turns death ears on me. God I'm so hu...