If Looks Were All....

Stop by and chk out my 13 things....
Okay so I am dating this guy who out of all my daters this month I have the most interest in, and things were going pretty well until the other day. Now some may take this as a bad thing and others might not...I am sort of in between the two. This guy is a Chicago Policeman who stands about 6'2 about 190ish and he has Cancer...well it is in it's early stages so it's not bad as it could be.

Now when I met this guy , which was at a(and don't laugh
Millz) Kareoke Bar, He had this shoulder length dark curly hair. I found it appealing, but that wasn't why I liked him. He had this sexy manly voice that could rival any late night radio DJ. I found it appealing, but that wasn't why I liked him. He was tall like a basketball player with strength to match. It was appealing, but that wasn't why I liked him. He had a great career and plenty of money to spend. It was appealing, but that wasn't why I liked him. He looked like he just stepped out of GQ magazine with the fit to match. With that body of a King. It was appealing, but that wasn't why I liked him.

You see when I met him he looked real nice on the outside, but I am the kind of girl who is more concerned with what's on the inside. Now don't get it twisted, I mean something to look at everyday doesn't hurt. Cause only a Mother can love something as NOT SO ATTRACTIVE AS SAY....Flava Flav. Come on now folks it has to be the money with that guy. Anyway, I believe just as the bible teaches that God looks on the heart of man. God sees us at our most un attractive moments and yet he still loves us right? And by unattractive I don't just mean as far as looks go. I mean as far as everything goes. We have those days when our attitude sucks and stinks like hot garbage...and God loves us still. We have days when we just want to strangle our co~workers, and God loves us still. We disobey his word, and he loves us still. We do all kinds of things to make ourselves look unattractive to him, yet he looks at out heart and therefore likes/loves us still. So that's the way I try to fashion my lifestyle...on getting to know what's in a mans heart. How he thinks. What drives him. What moves him. What his goals are in life. Which direction he's headed in...you know things that make his outside look even better. So for this guy I was into him when he opened his mouth. He was intelligent and kept my attention. I wasn't thinking about the next pair of shoes I was going to buy or what was coming on TV later that night. I was drawn in by his insides.

Well since we have been hangin out, he has undergone chemotherapy treatments and he has lost some hair. He has lost some weight. His voice scratches sometimes. And he (at times) has little energy. I have gone with him from time to time to his treatments and it was nice being there for him....then all of a sudden he started to go inward...like he was drawing back from me. At first I let it pass thinking he was just a bit scared with this cancer and all. (cause men get scared too) Then I had to ask him one day when we were supposed to hang out, but wind up spending a whole day inside. We had a long talk about us and where it might have the opt to grow. And then he said something that just blew me away. He stated that he felt unattractive and that I...(me) might leave him and go to another guy, due to his hair loss and other things. I was taken aback at first. Then I held his face, looked him straight in the eyes and said
...."If looks were all I liked you for...I wouldn't like you at all." Meaning it would only be infatuation. I would like only what I saw and not those things I can't see. I am not impressed by looks alone. It's nice...but that don't move me. What else you got? I want to fall in love with the soul. Cause case of point my friends...looks fade. Well we haven't hung out in a while and believe me it's no reason of my own. If things pick up again, it will be a wonderful thing.

The Prince Or The Toad...which would prefer?
U.W.R.A:)

Comments

Well, I really hope things pick back up. Just from the narritives and slick word punches you pull shows happiness in your writings.

Keep that up.
Keep his spirit up too.
There is a reward, but you know that.
Didi Roby said…
Hassan...

Thank you very much. I sure do:)
Brea said…
Awwwwwwww. I hope things get going again. That sounds too cute to end there.
Unknown said…
You're right, it's not just looks alone that makes someone attractive, or beautiful.
Anonymous said…
wow.... this is a GREAT post, girl...

i agree with you.. looks fade... what's inside stays longer..
Rose said…
YOU KNOW WHAT DEE DEE YOU CAN TELL A STORY. I HOPE ALL ENDS WELL WITH THIS ONE. HE'S TRYING TO FIGHT FOR HIS HEALTH AND HE KNOWS THAT IF CONCENTRATES ON YOU, HE MIGHT NEGLECT HIM.
PAINKEY said…
dont let him push you away bc of his insecurities. You want him, you think he is worth the fight, go for it. call him up, get the ball in motion again....if he is what you want, fight that cancer for him....

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